With the DNC hacking, rumored collusion with Russia, and the controversial ending to last season’s Bachelorette, political corruption has been at the forefront of news coverage. Despite that, there has been one key issue, that for some odd reason, has been mercilessly overlooked: Day light savings time. Day light savings time is tearing our country apart, and it’s time for someone to do something, and that someone is me. I’ve decided to take matters into my own hands, and email my U.S. Senator, Elizabeth Warren. Here’s what I wrote in regards to the oppressiveness of day light savings time:
Hopefully my U.S. Senator/Native American Princess will recognize the urgency of the issue, and send my complaint right up the ladder to the executive branch. Did I vote yesterday? No, but I think this makes up for that, and then some. I have a feeling this is a start to my long career in politics. I’m basically Frank Underwood, minus the whole Kevin Spacey touching dudes then blaming it on being gay thing. Regardless, I feel like a true Patriot today.
PS: Elizabeth Warren is the Anti-Christ. Fuck her. Congrats on being a less successful Hillary Clinton.